Facing My Insecurities

Cool, Tuesday the 13th of May 2025 and I'm gonna try to keep this reflection brief. I'm feeling a little bit more confident about facing my insecurities. Now I must admit that these insecurities are actually grounded upon not something that is internal, not something that

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originates from me, but something that originates from kind of like the things that I've observed, the people that I've observed and how I've seen those people getting treated and

how they inevitably just kind of like shut themselves out of opportunities. Now I'm gonna try to basically hone in on that and get a little bit more specific. When it comes to kind of like me being a music entrepreneur, when it comes to me being a rap artist, there is a theme and there is kind of like a subject and there is a little bit of a history when it comes to kind of like, you know, the appropriateness or kind of like,

you know, at what point do you effectively kind of like no longer become, I guess, you know, acceptable, you know, to effectively rap, you know, when it comes to like age and stuff like that. Because, you know, there's been a couple of like debates and discussions that have existed within the field, within the realm of within the discourse of like rap, hip hop and stuff like that. Artists like Jay Z, whom have evolved, like, you know, obviously started rapping quite young,

you know, evolved as time has gone on, and effectively maybe even hit a ceiling or hit a point where people started asking like you know at what point kind of like you know does one kind of call it quits if that's to speak. Now I'm kind of like in this middle part of my career even though kind of like you know I haven't really started you know I would I wouldn't say that my career has taken off I'm kind of like halfway through this kind of like, you know, unwritten lifeline.

Because I think if I get to kind of like 50 or whatever it is, even some people right now would say that I'm a little bit too old to rap. And, you know, this kind of like, you know, I guess this kind of like theme and this kind of like way of seeing things

kind of like creates this potential pitfall where I can easily fall into and effectively kind of like that insecurity can grow because of my age because of kind of like you know where am I in life and you know what I'm doing maybe some people might it's not to say that people do because at the moment I haven't really tested the waters to actually validate that at all you know this isn't say that this is true, but some people may turn around and say, I'm a little bit too ultra rap,

that may be kind of like I'm holding on to like a false dream, so to speak. But in essence, right? This, the whole point of this reflection has got me thinking about, is to get me to think about like,

the percentage or the niche of the audience that I want to be able to kind of like nurture the percentage or the niche of the audience that I want to be able to kind of like nurture because I'm confident, I am a firm believer in and of the fact that I can siphon, I can get a chunk of kind of like the UK music scene or the rap scene kind of like in general

to listen to my music because I have something worth their time, worth their ears, so to speak. And I kind of like wish that I didn't have to compress this reflection into like such a short piece because I would kind of like go a lot more in depth

when it comes to kind of like really arguing my reasons for why I actually have this confidence in the first place. The truth of the matter is like, I don't disagree. I don't disagree with the fact that, you know, rap is a young man's game. You know, it's a young person's sport and stuff like that.

Because like, you know, rap in its nature is very rebellious and kind of like the older that you get, the more conservative you become, the more you start to kind of like, you know, your views start to change and it's kind of like, you know, young and it's mostly consumed by young people, right? Rap is mostly consumed by young people. Of course, you still have the old heads

that still consume it, but new music is mostly, you know, consumed by a specific age range of people. And then after a certain point, you kind of like start losing, you know, falling out of touch. Like, you know, the age range of people that consume rap music, you know, new rap music anyway, that doesn't change, but your age does. And so as a result, you're kind of like left in this position

where you're thinking to yourself, like, you know, how do you stay relevant? You're having your age, you're gonna continue to age, but then you have to find a way to like stay relevant. that produce and put together. And yeah, I just wanted to just basically say like, you know, it's a good feeling. And I'm very, very curious as well as confident to conjure up the universe and conjure up the strategy and the means by which I can maintain that relevance, irrespective of how old I get in this game. And it's going to be very fun to just basically irrespective of how old I get in this game. And it's going to be very fun to just basically explore.