Through This Apathy

Alright cool, Monday the 14th of July 2025 and I don't know man today I feel really apathetic. It's very weird. This is something that I've had to kind of like navigate with. I've had to deal with it pretty much since I really really started pushing kind of like the boundaries of you

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know where I'm at and where I want to be kind of like when it comes to like my rap music career and some days I just genuinely just feel apathetic, like there's literally like I don't feel anything at all. And it's kind of like very difficult to push through that feeling and effectively still

be creative and you know, kind of like still, still effectively kind of like put, you know, put my time to good use and effectively kind of like remind myself that what I'm doing I'm doing for a reason that in the end is all going to be worth it, you know, and that's kind of like the you know, the the the difficult aspect of it really, um in the fact in and of the fact that um You know, I need to be able to kind of like push through and do things even when I don't feel like doing them And uh today that apathy was constantly feeding me this kind of like idea that, man, like, you know,

I'm better off doing something else. I'm better off just basically chilling, playing video games, being normal. That's the thing that really scared me, is the fact that some days, you know, apathy can literally kind of like, you know,

hover over me in such a way that I feel convinced that I'm genuinely just an idiot. I'm genuinely just kind of like, I'm suffering from imposter syndrome like really badly. And it convinces me that, yeah, man, maybe I should just basically give up and quit because I don't really wanna do this. It's like literally, it was only up until I turned

my computer on and started putting some files together, started working and creating some designs that I truly basically felt alive and I truly connected, you know, reconnected with like, you know, my brand, my message, everything that I'm doing and the reason that I'm doing it.

So it's something that comes and goes at the moment. And I feel like, you know, kind of like looking back at some point when I finally do make it, it's something that I look forward to communicate about