Theory & Practical

Sunday, the 31st of August, 2025. And, you know, I'm still trying to, you know, as habitually as I can, try to hold on. This mindset shift that effectively kind of like removes me from the typical thought process that just basically crushes my spirit all the time.

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Like, it's very difficult to imagine myself as somebody that I've never really been before, when I'm effectively just kind of like dealing with a counterweight of somebody that I've always been. And this is always like one of the most difficult things that I have to face in, you know, kind of like becoming a better version of myself or becoming the version of myself that I actually want to be. It's very tough, because for the most part, I've been spending way more time, and I literally mean 99 % of the time, being the person that I've always been. 

Whether it's doubting myself, self -loathing, being too harsh of a critic, dealing with what people call the shadow self, my shadow self, the person that doesn't... I think the word that I'm looking for, doesn't... when things get tough, doesn't like, you know, push through the heavy, you know, the heavy lifting, like, you know, I'm always battling with that person. And, you know, I kind of like want to get to the point where I just make that mindset shift and I just basically have a long, consistent run of me just effectively like doing the things that I need to do in order to just get to like where I want to because without that mindset, it feels like, you know, the battle is already lost. and you know that's just kind of like all that I have to say for today.