Level Playing Field
Saturday, October 24th, 2026. I never really grew up with the intention or the sentiment to effectively be in a position better than anybody else. Like, I never grew up or I suppose.
I never felt like I was born with this innate desire to be better than anybody else.
Or to take points away from other people, to make myself feel better about myself. However, if I'm gonna be truthfully sincere about my experience, uh, the accounts that I've taken from, you know, growing up as, um, you know, uh, you know, as an adolescent, as a teenager, you know, going to school, which I think really and truthfully is the environment, is the testing environment or the, the, the, the, the breeding ground for the working environment, if that makes sense.
I mean, you know, how the periods correlate with like, you know, the 9 to 5, you know, all of that sort of business. Um, But yeah, essentially, like, If I'm going to be truthfully sincere, like, I started, I, you know, I genuinely feel like on the basis of my account and my perspective, I started to get this sentiment and this feeling that whilst I never really wanted to be better than anybody else, it didn't exclude the possibility for, Everybody else.
And I say everybody else, like, you know, I'm not essentially pointing my finger at any group of people or any individuals, but it's like I seem to, you know, to live in an environment that is built around the idea of, you know, being better than everybody else.
So in other words, other people were affected by this need to be better than me. And what this has ultimately done, and, you know, something that is still kind of like affecting me today. Sometimes in a very positive way.
Other times, like, you know, in a negative way or in a way that could do with a, you know, that has room for improvement. It's given me this, um, you know, this, this, uh, desire to do very well for myself. Do well for myself enough that nobody has this position.
Like, you know, I, you know, I grow suspicious of people that, you know, really, really, really look for room, room for a space to now begin to talk about how they're better than me or begin to find a space to argue and say that they're better than me in whatever shape and capacity. And these things, these things are quite subtle, even though they're very obvious to me, you know, underneath the naked eye.
You know, they're quite subtle when most people aren't trained to look for these things, if that makes sense. to hear it in discourse, to hear it in conversations.
But yeah, uh, and uh, the reason why these these things aren't looked for in in discourse is because it's accepted as normal. And sometimes it just often gets brushed aside. But for me, I genuinely wanted to do so well for myself that very few people can have room for, you know, conversations about how they're better than me.
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